


Drinking About You

by Skyler10



Series: Verse as in Music [2]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alcohol, Dimension Cannon, F/M, Friendship, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-11
Updated: 2015-01-11
Packaged: 2018-03-07 01:50:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3156491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyler10/pseuds/Skyler10
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Mickey Smith knew when Rose Tyler was 'fine' and when she was lying. And right now, she was most definitely lying." Even the unshakable, unbreakable and undaunted are allowed to have a breakdown. Tonight was Rose's turn. (Rose+Ten pairing)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drinking About You

**Author's Note:**

> I know this song doesn't 100% apply to them, but the line about "forever" just destroyed me when I thought about Rose post-Doomsday and hearing it. So here we are.

Mickey shifted uncomfortably in his chair. Jake was enjoying himself, oblivious to any tension. Mickey knew better, though. He knew _her_ better. He’d seen her at her lowest. He had been there after Jimmy Stone, through alien attacks, after the Doctor sent her back home. He’d even helped her rip open the TARDIS to get back to the bloody Time Lord.

Yes, he knew when Rose Tyler was “fine” and when she was lying. And right now, she was most definitely lying.

He studied her suspiciously as she downed another drink. Rose never drank this much. Not like this either.

Something was off in her eyes, too. Even before they reached the club, before they sat down at the bar, before she demanded that they have a roaring night to forget, he knew. He could see the hopelessness and loss and desperation written in her soul.

“Take care of her, love,” Jackie had whispered to him as they left the Tyler mansion. She wouldn’t have said anything like that if she thought it was just a normal night out.

No, there was definitely something wrong with Rose tonight. And damn if he didn’t know the one and only thing in the universe that could destroy her.

“SHOTS!” Rose shouted in his face. “THAT’s what we need! You know, I had been wondering. I just KNEW it. That’s it. JAKE! Order some shots!” She leaned around Mickey to make sure Jake heard her, then traced a finger down her ex’s shirt. “C’mon, Mickey. You’re not having fun at all! Loosen up, mate.”

“Rose…” he warned.

“Sooooo serious all of the time.” Rose pouted. “No fun.”

“This isn’t you.” He tried to get her to focus on his face, but she was too far gone. “Not like you at all.”

“’Course it’s me. Who else would it be?” Rose giggled. “Oh god, do you think I’m a Slitheen? I promise I’m not a Slitheen, Mickey. I swear.”

She was so serious, he almost laughed, but the mention of aliens grounded him to why he was trying to dissuade her from more alcohol and why – if he knew Rose – they were there.

“Just tell me, Rose,” he begged, grasping her hand to keep her from sliding off the stool and joining the dance party. “Whatever it is, you know you can tell me.”

“Really?” She grinned. “I can tell you anything?”

“Yeah, you know you can,” he encouraged.

She leaned in close.

“See that girl in the corner?”

“Yeah?”

“She’s been winking at you all night. I think she wants a Mickey hickey.” Rose laughed as if this were the funniest thing she had ever heard. “Should I tell her… should I tell her they last for weeks? Can never get rid of you. Cuz if anyone would know…” She draped an arm over his shoulder like an old buddy. “That’d have to be me. Yup.” She popped the “p” before she could stop herself and a haunted look crossed her hazy expression. “Where ARE those shots?!”

“Rose, it’s time to go.” Mickey decided it was time for someone to stop this. To stop her. He had spent far too long getting over her and rebuilding their friendship to watch her like this.

“You can go, but Jake and I are having a good time despite you, Mr. Serious-Pants,” she slurred before giggling again.

“No,” Mickey argued. This would be harder than he thought. “I think you need to come home now with me.”

“Ooo, no, no, no, we’ve been there done that. Honestly, Mickey.” She rolled her eyes. “I thought we were pretty clear about… ya know… us.” She gestured between the two of them in case he had any doubts.

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.” He was getting exasperated by now. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. She was the conscientious one in this post-dating, Pete’s World, brother-sister friendship. She was the one always telling him to focus, to get serious, to work harder. Every waking minute spent on that dimension thing, shooting herself through time and space trying to find the Doctor. Sure, the missing stars freaked him out too, but they had seen a lot of weird stuff working at Torchwood.

But while it was a puzzle to him, it was the center of her life. Her entire existence since being trapped here seemed to hover around finding a way back to the Doctor and when she heard their newest mystery had torn open the Void, nothing could stop her from throwing herself through the gaps again and again.

Until tonight. Tonight there was no pizza in the Torchwood basement, no physics books or data collection or lab equipment to work on. He never thought he’d miss the sight of her disappearing so hopeful and reappearing so disappointed, stolen away from her search by the machine’s time limits. But it was just a prototype. Soon she would have it fixed and be able to stay as long as she wanted.

He realized, of course, that she might never come back.

“I’m a big girl, mate.” At first it seemed she was reading his thoughts, but then he realized she was still trying to convince him to go home alone. “I think I can find my way back to my own house. ‘S little hard to miss.” She tipped a shot glass at him in salute and knocked it back before winking at him. “’Sides, I’ve handled a lot worse stuff on my own. No need for a companion.” She winced at the word and took another shot.

“Fine.” He slammed a hand down on the bar, startling her in her drunken teasing. “The tin dog knows when he’s not needed.”

He almost stormed off but paused to give her one more plea to come back with him. He didn’t have a good feeling about this night. But he stopped himself when he saw her flirting with the bartender, whom they both knew was engaged to the DJ. He knew he had nothing to worry about for her safety from the bloke, but that only gave him permission to let his frustration boil over. It’s true that this – whatever this was – wasn’t like her at all, but stepping all over him without even realizing she was doing it? That was all Rose.

Still, he couldn’t get it out of his head: the ever-present sadness in her eyes that had flamed into reckless brokenness tonight. It was just a passing connection, as if holding his gaze any longer would have shattered her completely, but it colored every minute of their night after. It kept him from lashing out completely at her, or wondering if she had been infected with some weird alien parasite while hopping from dimension to dimension.

He shoved his hands deeper into his coat pockets as he trudged through the powdery white falling around him. _Rose will be freezing in just her coat and that tight little number she had gone out in._ He squelched the thought, part out of realizing he was starting to sound more like her father than her brother and part because he remembered he didn’t care. He was still too mad to be bothered by whatever chilliness Rose would encounter.

Back at the bar, the shots had lost their appeal. The dance floor was clearing out, and Rose was moving on to the next phase of drunkenness.

Remembering why she came in the first place.

Jake returned with two glasses of clear liquid. Rose raised her eyebrows.

“It’s just water,” he reassured as he sat down next to her. “Blimey, Rose. I’ve never seen you like this.”

He meant it as a joke, expecting a cheeky retort, but instead he received a meek, short-lived smile. She stared off at an indistinct point across the room.

“Wanna talk about it?” Jake lightly pushed her shoulder with his. She pushed back, but when he stayed silent, waiting for her to answer, she just shrugged.

A new song came on and Jake saw a lone tear make its way down her cheek. She made no attempt to brush it away.

“C’mon.” Jake led her away from the crowded bar and found a quieter area with fairly private booths.

They sipped their water, listening to the song.

_I can’t stop drinking about you._

_I gotta numb the pain._

_I can’t stop drinking about you._

_Without you I ain’t the same._

_So pour a shot in my glass and I’ll forget Forever…_

Suddenly Rose was shaking with silent sobs. Startled, Jake pulled her close and held her until she stopped.

“Sorry,” she mumbled, pushing him away slightly.

“It’s alright.”

A few heavy seconds passed by. She was staring off at nothing again.

_So pour a shot in my glass and I’ll forget Forever…_

_So pour a shot in my glass ‘cause it makes everything better._

“I found it today.” She broke the silence. “The right dimension. _His_ dimension. Home. But he wasn’t there.”

“What happened?” Jake prompted.

“There were all of these weird white alien things – kinda cute actually – they were being beamed up to some sort of spacecraft.”

“Sounds about right.”

“And this woman… She was being beamed up too, but they let her go. She… she fell impossibly far and landed right in front of me. I can’t get her out of my mind, just lying there…”

She took a large swig of her drink, even though it was just water now.

Before Jake could console her about the grotesque image, she went on.

“But he never showed. He didn’t save her. People everywhere just standing around, watching these baby alien things flying through the air and he wasn’t there.”

Jake hugged her close again.

“All that time. All that time I spent looking for the right dimension and I never considered what if he wasn’t there? Stupid, I know. Stupid ape, he would say.”

“Rose.” Jake backed away and tilted her chin up. “I don’t know the Doctor all that well, but I did see the way he looked at you. There’s no way he would say that about you.”

Rose nodded and stared at her hands for a bit before meeting his concerned gaze.

She swallowed hard.

“I still love him, Jake. And I hate myself for it. He’s been gone two years today and all I can think about is how he would know down to the millisecond how long it’s been since he faded away on that beach. I watch him die in my nightmares every night. And, well, you know what I do every day.”

“So that’s why you never sleep. We had an office pool going to guess. My bet was on superhuman strength.”

She smiled a bit to show his attempt to lighten the mood was appreciated.

“What if it doesn’t work?” Her mourning returned.

“Of course it will! Look how far you’ve come already. You found the right dimension! Isn’t that something to celebrate?”

She let out a humorless bark-like laugh. His genuine confusion held back her sarcasm, however.

“No. I thought it would be, but think about it. He’s a Time Lord flying around in his TARDIS. He could be anywhere. And not just in space. In time, too. He could literally be anywhere, any time.” Rose ran her hands through her hair. “And I have no idea how to find him.”

“Keep trying,” Jake quickly pressed. “You can’t stop now, Rose.”

“Thanks.” She let her lips turn up in another rueful smile.

Just then, Rose’s phone beeped with a text from Mickey:

_Three more stars gone tonight. Thought so when I was walking home. Checked with star chart. That makes 10 this week. Idk what is going on in your head tonight, Ro. God knows I never have. But whatever it is, don’t forget the stars._

Rose sobered as she picked up the significance behind his closing statement. It was something he had said as a joke to her before he stayed behind in this dimension. Even though they hadn’t known it then, it would be their last conversation between just the two of them for a long time.

* * *

 

“You know, I can see how you feel about him,” he had confessed to her. “Known it for a long time. Maybe it’s time for me to head back.”

“Doesn’t matter,” she had assured him. “You’re my best mate, Mickey. You’re always welcome here. You don’t have to go just because we’re, well, you know.”

“But I should.” He gave her a pointed look before winking and teasing her with a badly quoted line from an old movie they had seen. “Besides, don’t forget the stars.”

“It’s ‘we’ll always have the stars,’ and they were talking about… Oh never mind.” She hugged him tight and closed her eyes.

“Tomorrow. One more day and I’ll ask him to take me back.”

“I’ll miss you so much.”

She knew he knew: her lack of a fight for him to stay said it all. Rose wasn’t one to give in easily – her relentless fighting to get back to the Doctor was proof enough of that – and she really would miss him. But not enough. Not nearly enough for him to stay.

“Mickey?”

“Yeah?”

“Wherever you go, whatever trouble you get yourself into...”

“Oi!”

She grinned up at him.

“Don’t forget the stars.”

* * *

 

“Jake?” Rose shook off the memories and sat up straight.

“Hmm?” He returned his attention to her, lost in his own thoughts as well.

“I’ve got some missin’ stars and a Time Lord to find. You coming?” She forced a smile to show she was better now. “How long are you gonna put up with me dragging you around like this?”

“Apparently, forever.”

“Don’t… don’t say that word. Sorry, just…” She didn’t really want to explain what a simple word in a song lyric had done to her tonight, first when she was getting ready at home and then again as they sat there at the bar.

“Ok…” He wanted to ask, but wisely held back. “How about however long it takes to get you back to wherever you would obviously rather be than here?” This was rewarded with her first genuine smile of the night.

“Let’s get out of here.” She led the way out of the club as the song came on one more time.

 _No one’s gonna love you like I do._  
_No one’s gonna care like I do._  
 _And I can feel it in the way that you breathe._

She didn't need to hear any more of it. That was enough for her. And it was the truth. Because it was never just about saving the universe for her. It was about saving him as well. Wherever, whenever he was, she would fight until she could be there to hold his hand across time.


End file.
